"Yeah? Well, now I'm gonna have to misuse police property and be a time thief and make you one," he answers, knowing that's never going to happen even as the words are out of his mouth. He doesn't have the slightest idea how to even begin doing something like that, for starters. All his coworkers are a hell of a lot better at computers than he is and while he's learned enough to get his paperwork done, the man who used to fill out paperwork on a typewriter isn't going to be designing posters any time soon.

"Also probably pay off someone else to do it," he adds. "Because I don't know shit about computers."